Welcome to the ANZAC Day Edition of the VNEWS……

View the VNEWS in your browser.

VJOKE

A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of the University of Maine . They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn’t really all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it to their religion. Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences. Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had various bandages on his body and limbs, went first. ‘Well,’ he said, ‘I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation.’ Reverend Billy Bob the Baptist, spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, ‘WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we Baptists don’t sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear, and then I began to read to my bear from God’s HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus. Hallelujah! The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape. The Rabbi looked up and said: “Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start.”

VBIGBET  

The biggest winning wager with us last Saturday was at Randwick:

• Randwick R9 – Tribal Wisdom $2k TF at $8 – Credit of $14k to the VICBET Client……

And the largest losing wager with us was at Caulfield:

•  Caulfield R6 – Cliff’s Edge $12k Fixed at $1.60 Pre-Post (Unplaced) – Loss of $12k to the VICBET Client……

VBET

This week’s $100 VBET goes to Bill P thanks for the feedback on the website…

Owen B used his $100 VBET on a Ballarat Multi last Sunday, unfortunately “No Cigar” for Owen. The $100 VBET next time will go to the person who replies with a joke………

VH2H – Head to Head Betting

Our exclusive Head 2 Head Betting is getting more and more popular and is available seven days a week on every race. A reminder if you would like to nominate a particular H2H in a Group of 2 or 3 in any race then simply text Tim Cleary (0433-339347) and he will put online for you…………

VMEETINGS

All the Group Racing interest next Saturday shifts to the “Stand-Alone” Hawkesbury meeting with three Group 3 races, as well as Morphettville and Doomben with Group 2 and 3 Action………On ANZAC Day we have 13 Meetings Online now……

VKEEPING 

If anyone needs their login details we have a new application that will automatically send a text and an EMail with them…..Simply reply to the VNEWS or text Rod if required…………..

VFEATURE RACING 

Up on the VICBET website there are lots of Feature Races available including the Melbourne Cup, Cox Plate, Caulfield Cup and others………….

VPROMOTIONS

VICBET.COM ANZAC BONUS – If your name starts with A, N, Z, A or C then you can deposit up to $200 on ANZAC Day and you get another $200 in the account to bet with on ANZAC  Day, TO X 2 and excludes Odds-on chances. This is also for any friends that name starts with ANZA or C as well………….

VFACTS 

Nothing to report this time, Warrnambool next week……………..

VREFER

OK this is the part we you as a VICBET Client can get something for nothing. When someone opens an account and you have referred them then we will reward you….…….

VEND

If you are new to VICBET welcome, if you have an account and have misplaced your login details please text or call Rod on 0412-126126. or FREECALL 1300-126126.……

I will then Email and text the details to you straight away……..

If you know anyone that would be interested in a VICBET account, it doesn’t matter if they are a $1 punter or more, everyone is treated equally so please pass on our website details…..

Good Luck and Happy Punting……